In Diary of a Spider, the team that delivered the best-selling Diary of a Worm spins another witty tale of an unusual protagonist and his unique view of the world. This time the hero is a spider, whose best friend is a fly, and though his world is experienced mostly from upside-down, and includes sticky webs and gigantic shoes, his musings will delight and reassure young readers. Through droll diary entries the baseball-capped son in a family of worms describes both the dangers and the perks of life underground in Diary of a Worm. Having a head that looks like your rear end is just one of the difficulties, as well as being dug up for bait. This clever and energetic worm’s-eye-view of the world will leave children – and their families – howling with laughter.
Having a head that looks like your ear is just one of the difficulties of being a worm. Through droll diary entries the baseball-capped young son of the worm family in this hilarious story describes both the dangers (being dug up as bait) and the perks (never getting in trouble for dragging mud through the house) of life underground.
Fifth grader Patrick Lowe loves to draw. While he fills sheet after sheet with beautiful drawings, he imagines he is the indomitable White Knight, far removed from the problem that haunts him at school: he can't read. When he tries, the words blur, and he feels like he's suffocating. As a result, many of Patrick's classmates think he's stupid-and Patrick believes them. Then Celina moves into the house next door. She likes to read so much that her face glows whenever she picks up a book. Can Celina prove to Patrick that he really is smart, or will a crisis prove her wrong? Just Call Me Stupid is a Florida Sunshine State Young Reader's Award-winner. Tom Birdseye's perceptive and heart-warming stories of childhood are on school reading lists across the country. Birdseye's realistic writing style and narrator Johnny Heller's emotional narration are an irresistible combination.
Dear Listener,
The word carnivorous means meat eating and this carnivorous volume contains such a distressing story that consuming any of its contents would be far more stomach-turning than even the most imbalanced meal.
It would be best if I didn't mention any of the unnerving ingredients of this story, particularly, an unruly crowd, a wooden plank, and Chabo the Wolf Baby. I also shouldn't mention the features of the interactive CD, which include:
Perplexing word games
Photos from The Lemony Snicket Archives
Art from The Brett Helquist gallery
Sadly for me, I continue to research the lives of the Baudelaire orphans, but your time might be filled with something more palatable. With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
Performed by Tim Curry
From the best-selling author of Frindle, The Landry News, and The Janitor's Boy.
Twelve-year-old Natalie has written a fabulous book and is determined to get it published. Luckily, she has connections to the publishing world--her mother is an assistant editor at a major publisher. However, Natalie doesn't want any favors and doesn't want her mom to know that she wrote a novel. So she and her best friend Zoë devise a plan. Natalie uses a pseudonym, Zoë pretends to be an agent, and with a little help from an English teacher, the girls succeed. Not only does Natalie's mom publish the novel, but it exceeds everyone's expectations and becomes a bestseller!
Book 1
SpongeBob is invited to have tea with a new karate-chopping lady friend, Sandy Cheeks. But when he finds out that Sandy lives in a dome filled with air, SpongeBob's plan for a new friend might "run dry!"
Book 2
SpongeBob and Patrick Star are the best of friends until their annoying neighbor Squidward decides to interfere. But Squidward's plan to split up best friends might backfire on him in a big, hilarious way!
This audiobook offers 2 Spongebob Squarepants chapter books, written by Annie Auerbach and Terry Collins. The following titles are included in this audiobook:
-Hall Monitor
-The World's Greatest Valentine
Dear Reader,
If you have just picked up this audio, then it is not too late to put it back down. Like the previous books in A Series of Unfortunate Events, there is nothing to be found in these pages but misery, despair, and discomfort, and you still have time to choose something else to read.
Within the chapters of this story, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire encounter a darkened staircase, a red herring, some friends in a dire situation, three mysterious initials, a liar with an evil scheme, a secret passageway, and parsley soda.
I have sworn to write down these tales of the Baudelaire orphans so the general public will know each terrible thing that has happened to them, but if you decide to read something else instead, you will save yourself from a heapful of horror and woe.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
Dear Listener,
Nobody in their right minds would listen to this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay at the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded on this CD.
I can think of no reason why anyone would want to listen to a book containing such unpleasant matters as migrating crows, an angry mob, a newspaper headline, the Duluxe Cell, and some very strange hats.
I also shouldn't mention the interactive features of the CD, which include:
A perplexing word game ' Photos from The Lemony Snicket Archives ' Art from The Brett Helquist gallery
It is my solemn and sacred occupation to research each detail of the Baudelaire children's lives and write them all down, but you may decide to do some other sacred and solemn thing, such as listening to another book instead.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
Dear Listener,
This audio is the only one which describes every last detail of the Baudelaire children's miserable stay at Heimlich Hospital, which makes it one of the most dreadful audios in the world.
There are many pleasant things to listen to, but this audio contains not one of them. Within it are such gruesome details as a suspicious shopkeeper, unnecessary surgery, anesthesia, heart-shaped balloons, and some very startling news about a fire. Clearly you do not want to hear about such things.
I also shouldn't mention the interactive features of the CD, which include:
A perplexing word game ? Photos from The Lemony Snicket Archives ? Art from The Brett Helquist gallery
I have sworn to research and record this story as best I can, so I should know that this audio is something best left on the ground, where you undoubtedly found it.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
Dear Listener,
If you are looking for a story about cheerful youngsters spending a jolly time at boarding school, look elsewhere. Violet, Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire are intelligent and resourceful children, and you might expect that they would do very well at school.
Don't.
For the Baudelaires, school turns out to be another miserable episode in their unlucky lives. Truth be told, within the chapters that make up this dreadful story, the children will face snapping crabs, strict punishments, dripping fungus, comprehensive exams, violin recitals. S.O.R.E., and the metric system.
It is my solemn duty to stay up all night reading my history of these three hapless youngsters into a microphone, but you may be more comfortable getting a good night's sleep. In that case, you should probably listen to something else.
With all due respect,
LEMONY SNICKET
Chet Gecko has always loved a good mystery. Like how do you squeeze ketchup into those little plastic packets? And, who put the boom in Shaka-laka-boom-boom?
If there is a mystery to be solved, Chet's the one to do it. Who is he? Chet Gecko - Private Eye, the lizard from the fourth grade at Emerson Hickey Elementary.
Listen to the first two hilariously hip Chet Gecko mysteries in this one audio package!
